Muddy Penishead?

A real conversation I had with my non-state-sanctioned husband over Gtalk at work today** (yes, I am muddslider, don’t judge):

muddslider: I know right AND she's not mild to moderately retarded either

your god loves me

penishead: my GOD loves everyone

thats why he amde us

made

muddslider: um, have you SEEN carrot top?

penishead: variety

if we were all cool no one would know the difference***

muddslider: oh yeah, god loves the people of walmart

penishead: they are probably so much happier than we are

muddslider: or maybe he loves me so much that he tortures others for my amusement

that is actually a pretty awesome god

penishead: you are a twisted twisted person

muddslider: you're just now figuring that out?

penishead: no i knew it

i just need to point it out to you

maybe you will mend your ways

haha

muddslider: hahaha dreamer

penishead: Adam still loved Eve so I guess im ok

muddslider: even if you have to wear a fig leaf now

and all of our children will have to have sex with each other to populate the Earth

penishead: ugh

muddslider: but at least WE'RE not inbreds, right?

penishead: thats why we are so fucked up

no wonder we cant create a Utopia we're the people from WalMart

muddslider: yep

thanks god

penishead: and its all eves fault. cunning woman

muddslider: No, I'm pretty sure it's god's fault for letting Satan put the apple there

or wait

GOD put the apple there

just to be a manipulative bastard

"oh here, look at these yummy apples, but don't touch them"

penishead: the apple is a metaphor for the woman having sex with satan

muddslider: what??

what kind of Freudian bible school did you got to?

go to

penishead: its enoch

muddslider: who?

penishead: Enoch

 

muddslider: yes I read that, WTF is an enoch, sounds like something from starwars

penishead: he was eliminated by King James and the niceans from the bible

muddslider: little midget people with plasma guns

penishead: The Book of Enoch

muddslider: "Oh no, here come the Enoch! Cover your crotches!"

penishead: HAHAHA

muddslider: this is so going on the blog

penishead: just stop

muddslider: being funny? I can't

that's like asking me to stop breathing or stop painting my nails

penishead: my name is never to show up in your Blog ever

haha

muddslider: you have an alias, you know that

Well, you have several now

but for this one, I will call you penishead

** This was totally a work-related conversation as "penishead" is my unpaid adviser and source of inspiration.

*** I didn't bother pointing out to him that if we were indeed "all cool" then no one would know the difference; ergo, no one would ever get made fun of. Why bother having a serious philosophical conversation when it can degrade into making fun of the lost books of the bible?